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Wicca, that Goth Chick Religion

Wicca is an hilarious after-school activity in which overweight teenage lesbians form a circle and say funny words while lighting incense, with a Marilyn Manson CD playing in the background.

While slightly more credible than Scientologists, Wicca was founded by Gerald Gardner in the 1930’s or 40’s, depending on who you ask. Despite Gardner’s . . . → Read More: Wicca, that Goth Chick Religion

This is the title of a typical incendiary blog post

By Chris Clarke

This sentence contains a provocative statement that attracts the readers’ attention, but really only has very little to do with the topic of the blog post. This sentence claims to follow logically from the first sentence, though the connection is actually rather tenuous. This sentence claims that very few people are willing . . . → Read More: This is the title of a typical incendiary blog post

Did aliens help to line up Woolworths stores?

Matt Parker, based in the School of Mathematical Sciences at Queen Mary, University of London, has analysed the locations of the 800 Woolworths stores to reveal precise geometric patterns. This was based on the work of Mr Tom Brooks (a retired marketing executive of Honiton, Devon) who found similar patterns in prehistoric monuments across the . . . → Read More: Did aliens help to line up Woolworths stores?

Satan Goddess

January 28th is a dark day. It is the day Pagans, Wiccans,Witches, Heathens, Druids and other wicked folk celebrate the birthday of their evil SATAN GODDESS, RedAutumnRain.

Wiccans and Pagans commemorate her feast day which is known only to Elitists as the top secret, extra special, oathbound ninth festival on the Witch’s Wheel.

The SATAN . . . → Read More: Satan Goddess

It’s a burning question

By Ron Ferguson

SO WHAT’S your choice: burial or cremation? Hey, I knew that would get your attention right away. It’s one of these choices most people don’t want to think about and seldom discuss. It can bring a dinner party to a crashing halt.

Some people think that cremation is a comparatively recent . . . → Read More: It’s a burning question

Witch left homeless

by IainB

It was bad news today for Dortchen Wilde of Delamere Forest when local council officials closed down her home on basic failures of the building regulations.

Dortchen, locally known as The Wicked Witch, lived in a gingerbread house. Though nothing had been proven, she was strongly suspected in the case of disappearing . . . → Read More: Witch left homeless

A brief interview with the devil

By Mark Morford

The devil wore patent leather Bruno Magli wingtips, a Dolce camelhair jacket, houndstooth fedora.

We met at a small café on the outskirts of Amsterdam; he was dashing off to a climate meeting where he planned to heckle scientists in the form of a trembling flat-earther before cruising over to North Korea . . . → Read More: A brief interview with the devil

Jeff Bridges a Practicing Wiccan?

by P. Beckert

Most people know actor Jeff Bridges best for his starring role in the movie “The Big Lebowski” where he played a pot-smoking loser known as “The Dude.” Until recently, his private life has been very private. In fact, the only thing up until now that most people knew about the award-winning actor . . . → Read More: Jeff Bridges a Practicing Wiccan?

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New ‘Intelligent Falling’ Theory

As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held “theory of gravity” is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory . . . → Read More: Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New ‘Intelligent Falling’ Theory

Wiccans warn of Monday’s winter solstice shocker

By Queen Mudder

Wiccas’ harshest equivalent of a Federal Emergency Management Agency executive order was issued today.

The astrology warning by the Global Sabbath Council says Monday’s Yuletide solstice will will be a monster.

The 17.47GMT solar ingress into Capricorn is karmically blighted by Sunday’s retrograde Mars, which stands still at 19.41 degrees of Leo, . . . → Read More: Wiccans warn of Monday’s winter solstice shocker